Call me...


It�s amazing how one phone call can make you feel better. When everything around dampens your spirit, pick up the receiver and call any of your friends.

It�s been a depressing week, where emotion, unsure ness, rage seemed to take control of me. It�s overwhelming until I had to fight the urge to give myself a hell of a cry as the last resort. I don�t want to cry but then, once in a while, I just let it go.

My emotion was again being tested last couple of days. I�d like to thank Sham for lending a shoulder to cry on, for being a good listener, for knowing where to interject with his responses. The long conversation did give an impact to me. I felt better, much much better after that. It�s like it automatically switched off my about-to-explode mood. The thing is about having something to divert you from your misery or at least, make you feel better before you wake up the next morning with the damn thing pops out of your mind just after you gain full consciousness. And damn, I really hate it when that happens. Sucks big time! It�s like I�m back to The Cycle till God knows when.

Saturday was a blessing. I don�t have to deal with people except my family and most of all, I got the house all by myself for almost half of the day, with no one around, only me and the box. God wanted me to put myself together again by providing the peace I needed. Thank you dear God.

Again, I was being tested during the end of the day. *sigh* What�s wrong with me? Wantak ringed me when I was in the middle of �it� and it didn�t take him long enough to detect my mood at that moment. He knows very well of my fickle mind(really�? Nobody knows me better than I do�). We continued to chat but since he made the call from his office, we�ve set a day to hang out for coffee. Asked whether he could bring her girlfriend along but I don�t think that�s such a good idea. At this situation, three is a crowd. Only opinions from a mind are acceptable enough. and there�s no way I want to have a stranger along, though I know he will share our conversation with her at the end of the day but that�s the least I care about. Felt a little bit better after we hung up�

I�m kinda stable now and only God knows for how long. How I wish I can forward the day to Wednesday. Just can�t wait for the final paper to end. Shit to C++!